Painted Walls
by StrydeVex
Summary: A few days after Arcadia Bay was destroyed by the storm, Max and Chloe have left the Bay to make their way to Seattle, and Max has to come to grips with her decision. Eventually this will probably have Pricefield, but we'll see where it goes.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Life is Strange**

 **Well, hello to a fandom I've never had the pleasure of writing in before!**

 **I only recently finished Life is Strange (2 weeks ago or so) and I've been reading stories from here since then, and from what I've seen, those of you who write here are easily some of the most talented writers (authors?) that I've seen on this site.**

 **As it stands, I doubt that my writing will hold up to that of the older university students and avid fans that I've seen, but I hope that someone will like it anyway.**

 **For now, for lack of a better word, this will be a pilot chapter of sorts to see what kind of response there is to my writing and whether or not I should continue writing it before I finish my stories from other fandoms. We'll see, but please let me know what you think!**

 **Also, a note to everyone who may be here from my other writing, my language is in keeping with the game, so if you're averse to profanity, I would advise against reading this story.**

 **Chapter 1**

 **Max's POV**

 _Wind. Wind and rain, those were the first sensations Max noticed as she opened her eyes to the all too familiar scene before her. A storm- No, The Storm, was making its way towards land in Arcadia Bay._

 _Her gaze swept over the landscape, seeing all of the details that she'd seen so many times before. She could see and layout of the town, the beach being hit repeatedly with waves created by the storm. She could see every little thing that she'd seen that first day as she was sitting in Jefferson's class._

 _She turned around to be met with the sight of the lighthouse standing behind her, but she was alone with the wind and water. There was no one there, but words rang in her ears over the howling wind._

' _Make the choice Max.'_

' _Make it, you have to pick something.'_

' _Max, you can't let all those people die because of you, you're not that selfish.'_

' _But what if you are?'_

' _Could you let that happen? Could you really?'_

' _What about all of your friends? Do they really deserve this?'_

' _This is all your fault, but is it worth it?'_

' _Come on Max, has anything you've done since you got back actually helped anyone?'_

' _If they die, everything you've done for 'good' was all a lie.'_

' _Was it?'_

' _Was anything you did actually for them?'_

' _Or was it for you?'_

 _Max felt her knees give out as she stared at the Bay's approaching destruction, all because of her._

' _Come on Max, hundreds of lives in return for just one. Isn't that more than fair?'_

' _Are you really so greedy, so selfish, that you would do this?'_

 _The ground that she was kneeling on dug into her through the jeans she was wearing, but she hardly noticed the feeling._

' _Max, you don't have much time. Make your choice.'_

 _She felt something in her hand, and looked down to see the picture of the butterfly in her hand._

" _No, I… I…" She stuttered to herself, "I tore this up, you can't make me make this choice again… You can't…"_

' _Is this worth it? Is she worth it?'_

" _Please don't make me do this again… I can't…"_

 _The wind seemed to pick up, drowning out her own words, even to her own ears as she knelt, intermingling with the voices of people she knew._

' _Save us or save her.'_

' _This is your fault, Max.'_

' _You killed us.'_

' _Hundreds for one.'_

' _You'll never forgive yourself.'_

' _Make the choice.'_

' _The choice.'_

' _The choice.'_

' _Choose Max.'_

' _The choice.'_

' _Choose.'_

' _Choose.'_

 _Max's face seemed to go numb as she screamed into the storm, but there was no one to hear her._

' _Choose.'_

' _Max.'_

' _Max.'_

'… _Max?'_

 _The ground beneath her seemed to deteriorate, and as she fell towards the churning water below her, the voices didn't stop._

' _You'll never forgive yourself.'_

' _Max?!'_

' _Was it worth it?'_

" _Max!'_

 _She hit the water._

Max jolted up, panicked and freezing. A cold sweat covered her face, and thin blanket covering her body, though it had been crumped up from turning over and moving in her sleep.

Her hands were clenched into fists, holding the material in her hands so tightly that her knuckles were white. She looked around frantically, trying to remember where she was and what had happened.

She was in a small motel room, not in Arcadia Bay… There was no Arcadia Bay…

Her heart was pounding in her chest as she remembered everything.

"Max? Are you alright?"

Max started at the voice for a moment before she noticed Chloe sitting in the bed beside her, resting a hand on her shoulder. She hadn't even noticed the touch.

"I'm… Yeah, I'm okay…"

Chloe still looked concerned, "More nightmares?"

Max just nodded, dropping her gaze down to where her hands were still clenched into fists around the material of the sheet.

Chloe hesitated for a moment before continuing, "You were… You were muttering in your sleep for a bit, then you started freaking out… Are you sure you're alright?"

Max stayed silent, mulling over her thought. How could she tell Chloe about it? It was childish of her to be this scared of a bad dream, and this wasn't the first time Chloe had been woken up from her outbursts in the night.

"You don't have to talk if you don't want to, I'm just worried…" Chloe said after a few moments of silence.

"Sorry Chloe… You can go back to sleep if you want, I'm going to get some air."

Chloe frowned but didn't argue. She went back to lie down in her own bed as Max quickly put on her jacket and looked at the clock beside the beds.

'4:17'

She opened to door quietly and stepped out into the cold air, shutting the door behind her and folding her arms to keep a bit warmer. The light of the moon was enough to see a bit, but there wasn't much else to light the area. She slowly walked to Chloe's truck and leaned against it, collecting her thoughts.

The moisture from her breath crystalized into small clouds as her breathing calmed, but she hardly noticed the chill biting at her lips, but rather stared at the sky, looking at the moon and the stars.

After Arcadia Bay had been wiped out, she and Chloe and left. It was clear that there was nothing left of the town, and she couldn't bear the thought of being presented with the destruction she'd caused every day, and although the nightmares didn't really give her any reprieve anyway, she'd hoped that getting away might help in that respect.

There hadn't been many words, mostly due to Max's inability to carry a conversation because of the fact that she would nearly shut down any time that something reminded her of her decision, and Chloe didn't know what she could do to help her friend. Max had chosen her over an entire town and watched the destruction unfold before her own eyes, she didn't know how she could possibly relate to that.

During one of the few brief periods of communication that had occurred, Chloe had convinced Max that they should go back to Seattle for the time being, since there was nothing to keep them in Arcadia Bay anymore. She'd joked a bit about Max showing her around the city as Chloe had done for her when she'd returned to Arcadia Bay, but Max had already withdrawn into her thoughts about her decision.

Despite the time she'd had to think, she still didn't know what the fuck she could do anymore. She knew that she couldn't sacrifice Chloe, no matter the cost, but that didn't stop waves of guilt and pain at the thought of her friends in the storm. The damage she'd caused…

Max felt a trail of water running down each side of her face at the memory of the storm… She'd managed to hold it down while she was around Chloe, and she tried to do her best not to show how much pain she was in around the blue haired girl, but she hurt a lot...

Max couldn't help but thinking about what would've happened if she'd just let things run their course in the first place. If she hadn't been able to rewind time, and if Chloe had died before she even knew who she was. Sure it would hurt, but wouldn't that have been less damaging to everyone else? Chloe had said she would die to save the town, but Max couldn't let her go, not after everything… Chloe tried to cover up how she felt for Max's sake, but Max had noticed when her eyes were puffy from crying in private, and the people of Arcadia wouldn't have had to suffer for something that was out of their hands. It was all her fault, all the pain, all the suffering…

The tears continued to run down the brunette's face as she continued down this trail of thought, but she barely noticed as she slid down to the ground, leaned back against the old vehicle. She didn't notice that she'd started shaking, holding in silent sobs. Her right hand started to twitch- a nervous tick she'd developed from her rewinding.

She leaned forward and rested her head in her arms while she let her memories overwhelm her as they seemed to do more often.

Rewinding… What a fucking joke… To be able to play god, to help everyone, only to have it all ripped away and torn to shreds because of it.

A headache had started pounding in her temple at some point, her hand still twitched.

She lifted her hand to her head in a vain attempt to reduce the pain, but she could barely hold her hand steady enough. She couldn't help but worry that she might unintentionally rewind again whenever see lifted her hand, that she might set another disastrous chain of events in motion.

She could feel her breathing starting to pick up again, taking short, rapid breaths, but she didn't care.

The pain she'd caused, the damages, everything she'd ruined by rewinding to fix little problems.

Rewinding couldn't cause any damage, right? Just go back, fix your mistake, keep going.

She could say anything, accidentally offend someone.

Rewind.

Hurt a friend or accidentally let someone's secret slip.

Rewind.

Go somewhere that she didn't belong.

Rewind.

Ask someone about private information.

Rewind.

Try to save someone from pain.

Rewind.

Watch her best friend die over and over because of her mistakes.

Rewind.

Kill an entire town.

Rewind.

Rewind.

Rewind.

Max nearly screamed at the touch on her shoulder, jerking away in a panic at the feeling of a hand by her neck until she recognized the face of worry and concern framed by blue hair.

She closed her eyes, trying to quickly compose herself after getting lost in her thoughts. How long had she even been out here? She could see the horizon beginning to light up.

"Max…" Chloe started, but she didn't seem to know what to say. Max's own face looked down at her knees before her, trying to think up a way to get out of the situation. Chloe knew she was hurting, had been woken up by her nightmares before, but she'd never seen one of these meltdowns before.

"Max, please come back inside, you're shaking."

Max stayed silent for a moment, and nodded without looking back up. She felt numb, but could sense a few feelings as Chloe slowly helped her back to her feet and led her back inside the room where she'd woken up in a panic before. It was warmer, but she hardly noticed.

Chloe sat her down on the edge of her bed before kneeling down in front of Max and looking into her eyes, but Max looked away.

"Max, I'm really worried about you… You've been so quiet for these last few days, and… and when I wake up in the night, you say names, you cry, you beg for something, but you never say what, and now you go outside in the cold and when I come to check on you, you're shaking and sobbing on the ground." Chloe hesitated, as if she wasn't sure what she wanted to say next, "Max, please, I need you to let me help you…"

Max stayed silent for a few more moments before lifting her hand to wipe the tears that were still on her face from outside.

"I just… Chloe, I've fucked this up so much…" Max said through shaky breaths, "I tried so hard to help everyone I could, I did everything I could possibly manage to keep everyone safe, to keep you safe, and I've ruined everything."

"Max, you can't blame yourself for that. It wasn't fair to have a choice like that."

"But it was my fucking fault!" Max nearly yelled back, "Fucking with time isn't normal, what the hell else should I have expected! Everything I touch breaks, and I everyone I care about gets hurt because of me!"

She took a sharp, shaky breath to try to continue, but started shaking and hid her face in her arms instead.

"I'm so sorry Chloe, you don't deserve this mess, and you don't deserve me, I've fucked up so much…"

Chloe leaned forward and took the smaller girl in her arms, hugging her and gently rubbing her back. She'd never been good at comforting people, so she opted to stay silent.

The shaking stopped after a while, and Max fell into a restless sleep in Chloe's arms shortly after.

The blue haired girl didn't want to risk waking Max, so she stayed there, holding Max as she slept. The occasional whimper or quiet cry escaped Max's mouth, but the shaking didn't come back. After a few hours, Chloe slowly laid Max down into the bed. She looked at the brunette as she slept. She blamed herself for so much…

Chloe gently brushed some of Max's hair out of her face as she slept, wondering if she would ever stop blaming herself for what had happened.

Chloe sighed before lying down beside the brunette in case she was woken by another nightmare and closed her eyes to try to get a few hours of sleep.

 **I'd love any input that I could get from anyone who made it through my fucking terrible writing, especially since I'll need it to judge whether this is something I should continue soon. Still, I hope you enjoyed!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own Life is Strange**

 **Not gonna lie, I'm rather surprised that I got as much positive feedback as I did for this story. Compared to some of what I've read, this must be utterly unimpressive, but thank you regardless! Hopefully I can deliver on your expectations!**

 **Granted, 3:30 a.m. is probably not the best time to be writing, so I hope you'll forgive any small grammar issues with this one.**

 **Enjoy**

 **Chapter 2**

 **Chloe**

Max was still asleep, but Chloe had woken up to sunlight gently lighting the room of the small motel they were currently staying in. There wasn't really any reason for it, Max had been relatively quiet after her episode during the night, but Chloe was still worried about the smaller girl. After she'd gone out to find out why Max had stayed outside for so long, she hadn't been able to stop worrying about her. Max had been doing everything she could to appear like she was handling everything okay, but now, she clearly wasn't, and Chloe knew it.

Chloe looked over to where Max was sleeping and watched her. Her mouth was turned down at the corners in a small frown, but there were no sounds escaping from her lips at the moment. Her breathing was shallow, but steady, and her hands didn't seem to be too tight. Everything seemed like it was okay, but Chloe still couldn't seem to convince herself that she should be able to get some sleep before the day got moving. She was afraid that if she closed her eyes for too long, Max would have another nightmare.

Her gaze drifted back up to the ceiling after a little while as she thought. She couldn't help the sharp feeling of pain in her chest at the thought of Arcadia Bay and the people who were no longer there. A part of her was upset at that she would never be able to see her home as it was, another wondered what could have happened to her mother, but there had been no contact from anyone since the storm. She'd made sure to check her phone constantly for that. The majority of her thoughts drifted towards the thoughts and emotions of the brunette sleeping beside her, and the self-hate and guilt she knew that the girl was harboring because of the choice. It would heal in time, probably, but Chloe was worried about now, not later. Later would come, but now, she needed to figure out how to get Max's mind off of the Bay.

The bed squeaked a little and Chloe looked back towards Max to see her small frame shifting slightly. After a few seconds of small movements and stretches, her eyes opened. Chloe looked at her eyes for a few moments before speaking.

"Morning Mad Max. Sleep well?"

Max lifted a hand to rub her eyes as she talked, "I guess so. How come you're in my bed? I was under the impression that sleepovers didn't have to be in the same sleeping area."

A small smile hinted at the corner of Max's mouth as she finished the last sentence, but it didn't last long.

"Well I can't leave my first mate to manage a vessel on her own, who knows how much could go wrong without my direction and wise guidance? That just doesn't seem like a risk worth taking."

Max almost giggled at that before giving Chloe a gentle shove, "I can manage a bed just fine!"

Chloe raised an eyebrow and gave a sarcastic smile, "Really? I'm pretty sure it would've sunk overnight if I wasn't here to keep it together, and you can't prove otherwise."

The hint of a smile on Max's mouth was a refreshing sight, and helped to somewhat remove Chloe's thoughts from the less-pleasant topics it they'd been about before. Now she had other things to occupy her.

"I suppose I can't, but knowing you, the bed would capsize because of your directions."

"As if," Chloe replied and stuck her tongue out at the smaller girl, "I'm the best captain and you know it."

Max rolled her eyes, but she seemed to be in a much better mood now than she'd been during the night, and that was something both of them were grateful for.

"Well, get ready and we'll go get some food Maximus."

"So many nicknames today," Max commented as she stood from the bed to go take a shower.

Chloe stared at the ceiling again once the brunette was in the bathroom to take a shower, lost in her thoughts. She swore that she spent more time in her own head than she did in the real world these days, but who could blame her?

Her thoughts were currently leaning towards Max and her emotional health. She'd been worried before, who wouldn't be from the nightmares, and from how often Max seemed to just zone out now, but she'd never seen Max actually break down like she had during the night. Even right after the storm, she'd put on a brave face for Chloe and done her best to show that she wasn't having any internal conflict over the decision. It was done, the photo was torn, but the choice still tore at Max, which in turn, worried Chloe.

Possibly the worst thing about this was how withdrawn Max was acting recently. Over the week, they'd gotten so close, made up for the years that Max had been missing from Chloe's life, and vice versa, but it seemed like most of that was gone for some reason. Max just seemed like she was afraid of breaking things, no matter how much Chloe reassured her that she wouldn't.

A quiet sigh left Chloe's mouth, and she stood from Max's bed to stretch. Her arms lifted above her head, a small groan escaping her mouth in response to the action. Her neck was especially tense after the night of very little sleep, but she didn't mind. She'd gotten used to less sleep because of Max, but she couldn't blame the smaller girl. Besides, Chloe was sure that Max would tell her to go back to sleep if she wanted to, she hated to be an inconvenience for any reason.

A few minutes of thought later, the sound of the shower turning off came from the partially open bathroom door. It seemed a little odd to Chloe, but Max never seemed to like closed spaces. She'd still yet to go into detail about the Dark Room and what had happened there, but Chloe didn't want to pry into something like that, especially so soon after.

One of the next sounds to come from the bathroom caught Chloe somewhat off-guard. It sounded like Max had slapped her hands against the counter for some reason. It wasn't anything serious, normally, but Chloe was already worried as it was.

"Max? You okay?"

There wasn't a response from the other room, so Chloe walked over and gently opened to door. The sight she was met with didn't help with her concerns about the younger girl.

Max was standing in front of the counter wrapped in a towel, but her hair was still dripping wet. One of her hands was clenched into a fist on the counter, thought it wasn't holding onto anything, and all the blood seemed to have left Max's face, leaving her a ghostly pale. She didn't seem to be looking at anything, she just stared down at the counter in front of her.

Chloe took a few slow steps up beside Max, gently placing a hand on the girl's shoulder.

"Max, you there?"

Max visibly flinched at the touch on her shoulder, but she seemed to snap out of whatever thoughts she was stuck in.

"What? Oh, I… I didn't mean to worry you, sorry…"

Chloe interrupted her with a hug, ignoring the water still in her brown hair.

"It's fine, don't worry about it. Are you okay?"

Max's arms tentatively followed suit to Chloe's, but she still seemed tense.

"I'm… Yeah, I'm okay. Was I in here for too long?"

"I just heard a noise and you didn't answer me, so I came to check on you."

Chloe heard a small sigh from Max, "Sorry, I guess I just got lost in some thoughts again."

Chloe wasn't sure how to answer that, so she just held the brunette silently for a little longer before pulling away.

"Once I get ready we'll go find something to cheer us up, and we'll stay here one more day so we don't have to drive, okay _Maxine_?"

Max rolled her eyes, "Not if you call me Maxine again, I should make you drive extra for calling me that."

Chloe stuck her tongue out as her only response before going back out to the bedroom to let Max finish drying off.

After lying back down on the bed for a little while and allowing herself to wonder what Max had been thinking about, Max came out to let her take her turn in the shower.

 **Max**

She was losing it.

Her episode last night, and then the shower. It was stupid, fucking ridiculous, but she'd gotten lost in her thoughts while looking at the mirror, and next thing she knew, she thought she was fucking up time again.

Once Max had gotten out of the shower, she'd wrapped a towel around herself and looked at her reflection in the semi-fogged over mirror that was above the sink, and spent a few moments thinking about her choice- the only thing that she seemed to think about anymore.

She couldn't help but wonder if the storm even had anything to do with her powers. Maybe it was wishful thinking, but maybe it would've happened anyway, and she could just save Chloe and stop feeling guilty over it. But she couldn't know that.

Her powers… Her powers that she hadn't even tested to see if she still had since the storm came. She didn't dare, what if she raised her hand, turned back the world, and a new storm began? What if it was worse this time? Arcadia Bay was bad, terrible even, but it hadn't been in a major city like Seattle. What if she accidentally lifted her hand for something, like she'd done when she learned of her powers, and it just happened?

A familiar twitch started in her right hand again as she thought. She closed her eyes in an attempt to calm down again, but she could still see the storm, see her hand raising, see the blood pouring down her face from her trying over and over to fix something that was out of reach.

She opened her eyes and just for a moment, she thought she saw blood pouring from her nose in her reflection. She felt light-headed, and she quickly put her hands on the counter to try to keep her balance. She lifted a hand to her face, making sure that there was no crimson there, and there wasn't. Just water dripping down her face from her still-wet hair. The hand returned to the counter, holding her in place as the world seemed to twist and turn around her.

What if… What if anything…

Chloe still hadn't asked her about very much, but what if she did? Would she tell Max that she was overreacting, that something was her fault? It was her fault, it was, no one could argue that. She'd fucked up time and paid the price, shouldn't Chloe hate her for that? Doesn't she? Of course she does, everyone does, Max just breaks everything, everyone, nothing she does-

A touch on Max's shoulder made her nearly fall over as she instinctively jerked from the touch near her neck. A moment of panic later, she recognized Chloe, and the all-to-familiar look of concern and worry in her face.

Chloe talked to her, and did her best trying to comfort her as she always did. She did care… She showed it so much, but what if it was fake? What if it was because she didn't know how to tell a broken girl how angry she was?

"Once I get ready we'll go find something to cheer us up, and we'll stay here one more day so we don't have to drive, okay _Maxine_?"

Max almost smiled on the inside at that. Chloe knew how much she hated hearing her full name, but it was something to get out of her own head.

"Not if you call me Maxine again, I should make you drive extra for calling me that."

After that, Chloe left for her shower to get ready for the day, and Max couldn't help but watch her as she went to the bathroom. There was just… Something on her mind, something apart from the guilt, the paranoia, but she hadn't thought about it because those two things took the forefront of her mind.

As she heard the sound of the shower, Max laid back down on her bed for a little while, trying to figure out her thoughts. There were so many confusing things, so many little details that Max mixed up because of all the rewinding and different timelines. Hadn't she kissed Chloe in this timeline? Or was that another time? Just… Why the fuck was Chloe acting friendly? She'd killed her home town, and she was still doing everything to try to make Max happy. Just, why? Why did Chloe have to make her feel… Feel like this…

Max rubbed her hands over her face, trying to clear her head.

It was a stupid fucking dare, Caulfield, quit getting caught up about it.

The sound of the shower stopped, and Max sat back up to get dressed and ready for the day. Perhaps she would make it through the rest of the day without giving Chloe a reason to worry.

 **Fuck me, it's too late for writing, but I wanted to write this, so I hope it turned out. Turns out, Undertale has a rather good soundtrack to listen to while writing, so that and caffeine got this rambling mess done. Hope you enjoyed, and let me know what you thought!**


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